


Where Our Story Begins

by Iloveadabarba



Series: Private Practice 'verse [3]
Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: Adoption, F/M, Kid Fic, M/M, Marriage, Raising a family, reference to past rape/non-con of original character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-13
Updated: 2018-09-21
Packaged: 2019-05-06 04:28:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,407
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14634123
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Iloveadabarba/pseuds/Iloveadabarba
Summary: Rafael and Trevor are happily married and running their firm when they get the chance to start a family.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [tobeconspicuous](https://archiveofourown.org/users/tobeconspicuous/gifts).



> I love this pairing. 
> 
> The adoption story is based loosely on a friend's story. 
> 
> For ToBeConspicuous who encourages me to write what I want! I know you like some more Bangan!!

Rafael awoke to sunlight, warm against his back, he must have forgotten to close the curtains the night before. It was a rare day off for the firm partners. They were both usually up, dressed and starting their day before the sun had risen. 

He moaned into his pillow as he enjoyed the feel of the sheets on his body. Liv had given them luxurious sheets as a present at their engagement party. Rafael tried to explain to her that it was creepy for her to buy him sheets he was going to bang his husband on. 

She had just laughed and told him, “If that’s the case then you should wait to open your other presents.” He had turned bright red and his guests had laughed. He had taken her up on that advice and he was grateful for it. 

“Are you awake?” Trevor’s voice was low and soft. 

Rafael’s husband scooted closer to him, rested one of his hands on Rafael's waist and placed his head on Rafael’s shoulder. The perk of having a king sized bed was that his tall husband could be comfortable and Rafael could also sleep untouched should he want to. That wasn’t often but it was nice to have that option. 

“Mhmmm.” 

Trevor responded to Rafael’s sound with a gentle nip between Rafael’s shoulder and neck. Rafael was certainly awake now. He bit his lip when Trevor bit down hard on his neck causing his cheeks to flush. The man continued to kiss his neck loving for a few minutes. This was Rafael’s favorite way to wake up. One of their phones buzzed on the nightstand. 

“Trev-” Rafael sighed. A groan left his throat as his husband pulled away and sat up in their bed. Trevor reached over to the nightstand and looked at his phone. 

“Liv texted.” Trevor paused, “She needs us for a case.” he explained. 

“What?” Rafael groaned. “Why do we have a junior partner if we get called in on our day off.” 

He knew he was whining but he didn’t care. He sat up and placed his hands on Trevor’s face. He began to kiss the man passionately, hoping to distract him from whatever task Liv had for them. They didn’t work for the city, but Liv had found reasons to use their firm to SVU’s advantage. Nepotism at its best. Rafael normally wouldn't mind but he had plans for their day off, plans consisting of bed, food, bed, food, and of course, their bed. 

When they had decided to make Sonny a junior partner it had been a huge blessing. Sonny understood the type of cases that they wanted. He understood the work that they were focused on. Trevor worked mostly adoptions while Rafael helped rape victims with lawsuits. The former Detective finally put his degree to good use.  
It had been awkward at first. Rafael’s ex in the same office as Rafael’s boyfriend then fiancee then husband but they made it work. Rafael doubted it could have if Sonny and Trevor hadn’t been the kind people that they were. 

It got easier when Sonny started dating Carmen. Rafael credited himself with that pairing. He had noticed they way Carisi smiled at her even when they were working for the DA’s office. It continued when Sonny began to work at the firm. Carisi would bring her sweet Italian pastries in the mornings or offer to walk her to her car at the end of the day. One day Rafael asked Sonny point blank why he didn’t ask Carmen out. Sonny had sighed, “Because we work together and if it doesn’t work out-”

“Carisi, you work for a firm run by a married couple.” Rafael had rolled his eyes at Sonny’s flushed expression, “And it’s not like there isn’t a history between you.” 

Sonny had relented and now there was a second office relationship at Barba-Langan Law. Rafael did not mind one bit. 

“Raf.” Trevor looked puzzled. 

Rafael had stopped kissing him, maybe that’s why he looked confused. 

“Sorry, I was thinking about Sonny.” 

Trevor’s eyebrows shot up and he pulled away from his husband. 

“I’m sorry, what?” 

Rafael had to admit he loved the jealous expression on his husband’s face. Rafael closed the space between them and gave Trevor a soft peck on the lips. 

“I am glad he finally got the courage to ask Carmen out…” Rafael started, “but the point of a junior partner was-” 

Trevor captured Rafael’s lips and pushed him down flat onto the bed. Rafael enjoyed feeling his lover’s weight on him. 

This time when Trevor pulled away, Rafael saw a mischievous look in his eyes. 

“Liv wants to be involved. Both of us.” 

Rafael groaned again and pushed his husband off. He rolled to the edge of the bed and sat back up. He probably had crazy bed hair but he couldn’t care less.  
“She’s my best friend.” he mumbled. His friendship with Liv had been a journey of ups and downs but he appreciated her and everything she had done for him over the years. 

“So am I not allowed to text her?” Trevor got out of bed and began to pull clothing from his drawers and the closet. 

“You are not allowed to plot against me.” Although Rafael was sitting up he still felt half asleep, his eyes heavy and his body sagging. 

“Of course not, love.” Trevor walked over to Rafael and had to lean down quite a bit to kiss Rafael again. Rafael loved him even his morning breath. 

“I am going to shower and get dressed.” Trevor declared walking towards their en-suite bathroom, “You can sleep in a bit longer or…”

Rafael looked at his husband, that mischievous expression had returned in full force. 

“Or?” Rafael asked, a bit more awake. 

“Or you could join me?” Trevor said hopefully.

How could Rafael refuse that request? 

**** 

Every hospital was crazy. Rafael tried to avoid them as much as possible. The NICU was no exception to the rule. Nurses moved at lightning pace, avoiding each other like their movements were a choreographed dance. Rafael and Trevor found Liv in a waiting room. 

Rafael had gotten few details from Trevor on the car ride over. They were visiting a rape victim, survivor of, who had just given birth. She wanted to put the child up for adoption. That was definitely in Trevor’s wheelhouse but Rafael still wasn’t sure why he needed to be there. Maybe his husband had decided that if he couldn’t sleep in than Rafael shouldn’t either. But Trevor Langan was not a vindictive person, at least not since college. He had changed quite a bit since then but they both had. 

“Trevor. Rafa. Glad you could make it.” Liv smiled. Rafael could tell by her weary expression that she had been at the hospital possibly overnight. 

Trevor shook Liv’s hand like he always did. He wanted to treat her with the utmost respect as the Captain of NYPD’s elite unit. Rafael thinks the only time they hugged was on the wedding day.  
Rafael respected Liv but they had too much history for that. He gave her a tight hug. 

“How’s the baby?” Trevor asked. 

“Not great. She had a lot of drugs in her system. He’s early and underweight.” 

Rafael felt himself wince. Poor child. He felt sympathy for the helpless child but also for the mother. He couldn’t imagine the pain she was going through. Trevor had told him that jury had found the boyfriend not guilty of rape. The DA was able to get the assault charges through and get him in jail. The trial had been a difficult one Trevor had explained, the mother having to face her rapist and the father of her child. He wasn’t surprised drugs were involved. Trevor had explained in the car that her drug use might have swayed the jury against her. 

If wasn’t fair. Unfortunately Rafael knew the battle the DA was fighting all too well. 

“Sonny got the father to vacate his rights over the child last week.” 

Rafael vaguely remembered Sonny being out of the office that day. Rafael looked at Liv. Did she want another child? He and Trevor had been talking about children since their engagement. Rafael had objected to the idea at first, stating simply that with his track record he couldn’t be a father. Trevor, of course, did not agree. 

If Liv was getting another one then maybe he and Trevor could start their own process going.

A nurse came looking for Liv and she followed her out. 

“So, Liv wants the baby?” Rafael asked, “You didn’t have to be so cryptic.” 

Suddenly, Trevor’s hands were on Rafael’s shoulder. His posture indicated that he was about to get bad news. 

“Rafael, I was thinking that we could adopt him.” 

Oh. Rafael supposed he should have seen this coming. Trevor wanted a family. Rafael wanted one especially because Trevor wanted it. But a baby. They would have a high school student with two retired parents. And then college. 

A baby. 

“I didn’t want to bring up the possibility until the father had given up his rights.” Trevor looked sheepish. Rafael was trying not to look cross. He and Liv had been plotting. 

“I-” Rafael stopped himself. Did he want a child? 

“If I have totally misstepped, then I am sorry. I just… she wants the best for the child but she doesn’t think she is capable of giving him that.” Trevor explained. “And the financial burden of a sick child. He will be sick for a bit until the drugs are out of his system and-” 

“Yes.” Rafael blurted before Trevor could finish. “I want to adopt him. I want us to adopt him.” 

With the decision made, Rafael launched himself into his husband’s arms. 

“I love you,” he murmured against Trevor’s chest. 

“I love you too.” Trevor kissed the top of his head. 

***

The mother had been happy to meet them. Rafael could tell she was in pain, from the childbirth or withdrawal, Rafael suspected it was a mix. She was Latina, second generation Cuban-American, and she had connected instantly with Rafael. They spoke mostly in Spanish, sometimes Rafael would translate to Trevor, whose Spanish was elementary at best, other times he would let his conversation with her be organic. 

She didn’t want to be involved in the child’s life but she wanted the child to have a good life. Rafael admired her for that. He hoped that she could get her own life back on track. 

Trevor left to take a call. Rafael talked to her a bit longer. He had talked with many victims in the past, this however was much more personal. He wanted to impress her. He told her about his and his husband’s Ivy League degrees. He assured her that they would be able to take care of the child’s needs financially and emotionally. 

“What was your father like?” she asked. 

Rafael hesitated before answering truthfully, “Horrible.” 

”So you won’t make the same mistakes he did.” 

“No.” 

She smiled for the first time since their meeting. She was young, couldn’t be more than twenty. It seemed like she didn’t want their help for herself. She wanted to move far away and start over. Her eyes began to close so he excused himself. He stood up from the chair next to the bed and began to leave when he felt her hand grasp his. 

“I have a son.” she whispered. 

Rafael felt concerned, hoping her memory wasn’t impaired. “Yes, I know. We were just-” 

“No. Another son. He was born when I was 17.” she explained, “Last they told me he was still in foster care. No one adopted him.” 

Rafael returned to his seat. “What-” 

“Could you and your husband adopt him too?” she asked, her brown eyes pleading with him. She looked frail. The hospital gown was too large. Her skin was pale despite a natural brown pigment. Her black hair was stringy and unkempt. 

“I-” Rafael was at a loss for words. One child had been a big enough surprise for today. Two children. Could they actually do it? 

“Please, he will get lost in the system. He should be with his brother. Family is-” 

“Everything.” Rafael completed. He agreed with her. 

There had been another Barba child from his father. The woman had shown up at their apartment one rainy night. There had been so much screaming. Rafael and his mother didn’t talk much about the child that had been around two years old when Rafael was a preteen. His mother had confessed to him once that she wished she had been able to contact the woman and help her. His father didn’t help his wife so she doubted the woman had gotten any child support before or after his death. He often wondered if he would have been a more nurturing adult if he had a little sibling.

He knew he should wait and talk to Trevor first, but she had desperate tears in her eyes. 

“Please, I just need to know that they will both be ok.” 

Rafael squeezed her small hand. 

“Yes, we will raise them both. I promise. We will take care of them.” 

Rafael hoped Trevor wouldn’t be too cross with him. He figured since Trevor sprung one child on him today he shouldn’t have a problem springing one on him. 

He hoped his husband understood as he left the room so the young woman could rest.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rafael settles into being a father and he and Trevor meet Nathan, the first born son.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not beta-ed. 
> 
> Writing for fun and for a pairing I adore.

Rafael had always worked himself to exhaustion. In grade-school, in college, at every job he ever worked, he had felt the need to work twice as hard as those around him. He had something to prove. The poor Hispanic boy from the Bronx. The kids had laughed at him when his father stumbled drunk outside the school yard, in college he had been mockingly praised for his accomplishments, and even at the DA’s office he had been heralded as their bit of diversity. 

Although he had grown accustomed to feeling tired, he wasn’t prepared for the weeks since they met the baby. While the small boy fought for his life, Trevor and Sonny put the adoption into motion. The boy was tiny. Rafael had felt tears stinging his eyes the first time he saw him. The baby’s skin was red and thin, he could see the blood vessels underneath. A small cap covered his head, the nurse informed Rafael it was to help keep him warm in his incubator. There were all sorts of tubes and wires hooked up to him. Rafael feared that he would have to make the unthinkable choice again. He finally understood the power of hope as he watched the tiny boy fuss and cry. 

Rafael wished Trevor had spent more time with him at the hospital but someone needed to run the firm. They had a lot of cases already in progress when the baby was born and Rafael had been busy tracking down the first-born son. It hadn’t been easy. Rafael feared the child had been moved further than he could find. 

Trevor was surprised that Rafael had agreed to take on the women’s first born. He must have asked Rafael twenty times, “Are you sure?”. But Rafael was not only sure but determined. He wanted a family, he wanted to raise a family with Trevor and he wanted to give this two boys everything he could. 

Rafael read a lot at the NICU waiting room. Books on parenting, babies, what to feed them, how to raise them, etc. Truthfully he had been terrified every day he sat in the NICU, just waiting. 

He was glad that Trevor was home with him for their first night with the baby that they had named Rogelio. Their little soldier. 

They had been cautious about naming him but his birth-mother had insisted. She had checked out a few days after their first meeting. By then emergency guardianship had been granted to them and she was eager to leave. Rafael gave her his business card, hoping she would contact if she needed help. 

Rafael laid in bed awake. He could hear Trevor breathing, asleep in their bed. He let his eyes closed for a moment when Rogelio let out a cry. 

Rafael bolted from the bed, walking the few steps to Rogelio’s crib. He lifted him out of the crib and held him, exactly the way the nurse taught him in the hospital. Rafael had snapped at Trevor earlier in the evening for not holding Rogelio’s head properly. 

Trevor knew better than to argue with Rafael when he was tense so he had simply handed the boy back to Rafael and gave them both a kiss on the forehead. 

His crying stopped and the little boy looked up at him with wide eyes. 

“Raf?” Trevor’s voice was groggy. 

“Go back to sleep, Trevor. I got him.” Rafael rocked their child as Trevor went back to sleep. 

Rafael just wanted to watch the baby a bit longer before trying to get some sleep himself. Rogelio’s color had settled, to a light tan complexion, his eyes, green, similar to Rafael’s. It wasn’t all the strange considering the woman, his birth-mother, looked like she could have been a cousin of Rafael’s. 

He was healthy but the doctors had warned that his health problems could increase with age and complications from the drugs in his system at birth. 

Rafael didn’t worry about that as he held him during the night. 

***

Trevor was irritated with him. Rafael could see it in his body language and hear it in his tone when they spoke. Rafael had known his husband for enough years to sense that easily. 

Rafael had happily agreed to stay home with Rogelio while Trevor worked at the firm. Rafael thought Trevor liked it to. He came home after work, bathed the baby and had a bit of time to interact with him before they put him to bed. 

Rafael never imagined that he would enjoy being a stay at home parent but he was thriving. He took to it like he had law school with complete focus. 

Trevor sighed and was pinching his nose at the bridge. They were sitting on the couch, watching a movie to unwind before bed. 

“What’s wrong?” Rafael asked softly. 

“I wish I was home more.” Trevor confessed, “I feel like I am missing so much.” 

Rafael couldn’t argue with that. So much happened during the day. All of Rogelio’s little sounds, expressions and movements that Rafael had catalogued in his memory. 

“I can bring him to the office more often.” Rafael offered. 

They had made a few trips up to the office, for Rafael to sign paperwork and to have their co-workers coo over their bosses’ new baby. 

Trevor made a grunting noise. Rafael raised his eyebrow in response. 

“You let Sonny hold him more than me.” Trevor grumbled, “And Olivia is over here all the time. She holds him more than I do.” 

“Trevor, come on. Sonny has a lot of experience with babies and if you remember correctly Noah was once a baby too.” Rafael chuckled and leaned back to place his head on Trevor’s chest. 

The love-seat was the coziest piece of furniture in their apartment. 

“I feel like you trust them with him more than me.” Trevor confessed. 

Rafael thought back on all the times he had corrected Trevor’s hold on the child, how he bathed him, if the swaddle wasn’t tight enough or loose enough Rafael would redo it without even telling Trevor why. The baby’s safety and comfort were Rafael’s number one priority. He hadn’t thought about sparing his husband’s feelings or teaching him the new skills he would need to be a father. 

Rafael needed to think of a solution. He didn’t want to cause any separation between them. He had thought having a child would bring them closer. 

“How about I ask Sonny to bring in one of his Fordham buddies to work for the firm? After you finish up your current caseload we can hand everything over to them for a bit. We can stay at home with Rogelio together.” Rafael offered. 

Trevor’s smile was wide and brilliant. 

“Really? I won’t get in the way of you taking care of him.” 

Rafael offered a weak smile back. He felt horrible for making his husband feel distant from the baby. He had only wanted to take charge to make things smoothly not to leave him out. 

“You have never been in the way,” Rafael leaned forward and gave his husband the softest of kisses. He moved to deepen the kiss when a shrill cry come on over the baby monitor. 

Rafael started to get up but Trevor got up first. 

“I’ll check on him,” Trevor said as he moved towards their bedroom where Rogelio's crib was. 

Rafael waited a few moments before following. He watched from the doorway as his husband changed Rogelio’s diaper. Trevor talked to the baby the entire time, telling him how handsome he was, how stubborn Rafael’s was and how much he loved them both. 

If someone had told Rafael that after he left the DA’s office in his mid’s 40 that he would have a husband and a child he would have laughed in their face. Now, watching Trevor he couldn't see his life any other way. 

***

Nathan was four years ago. 

He was small for his age and had similar features to his half-brother. Brown hair and green eyes. His skin was lighter, his father was caucasian with no Hispanic heritage or so his paperwork indicated.

Rafael was able to locate Nathan only a few days after Trevor began to stay home all day. It was easier to do research and make phone calls when there was someone else to tend to Rogelio’s needs. And Trevor was wonderful with Rogelio. All the nerves he had at first with Rafael breathing down his neck had disappeared.

Rita offered to watch the baby while they went the foster home where Nathan lived in New Jersey. If they had a couple of meetings that went well they would be cleared to adopt him as well. His case worker assured them that judges like to keep siblings together. 

Nathan was energetic. He was running outside with the other foster home children when they arrived. They had been guided to the backyard by the foster mother, Nancy, who was holding a little one in her arms. She was polite to them but Rafael could tell she was overwhelmed. 

In his research he had learned she and her husband Steve took care of seven children including two of their own biological children. Nathan’s situation at his previous home had been rough, too many children and not enough care. This family had taken him when asked by Nathan’s caseworker and Rafael was grateful to them. Nathan’s in flex situation is what had made it difficult for Rafael to find him. 

“Nathan is a bit troubled.” she informed them as they watched from the patio. “He’s friendly but he has had a couple of fits since he’s been here. He gets really upset if he is alone for even a minute.” 

Rafael nodded. It made sense to him. He had been through a lot of homes according to his case worker. He felt Trevor take his hand and squeeze it, reassuring him they were doing the right thing. 

“His case worker told you about his medical issues?” The tone of her voice was tight. The baby in her arms fussed and she gently rocked the baby till she settled. 

“Yes, she did. And did she tell you we have adopted his half-brother.” Trevor spoke up. 

She turned to look at them and she smiled. “I think that’s wonderful.” 

Nathan ran up to them, “Wow! You are so tall!!!” He grabbed Trevor’s hand and led him to the yard. “Come play with us!!” 

Rafael chuckled as his husband was requested to swing each child up into the air. 

“So the paperwork they sent over said you and your husband are lawyers.” The foster mom sounded impressed.

“Yes, we both graduated from Harvard.” He explained. 

“That's great! Wow. What made you guys decide on kids?” She inquired.

“I… well, Trevor has always wanted a family.” Rafael started. He watched the baby in her arms squirm and fuss. A month ago he would have wanted to be a mile away from a child that was about to cry and now…

“May I help?” he offered. 

She grinned at him as she handed him her baby girl. “Thanks, I need to get her bottle, follow me to the kitchen?” 

“Of course.”

He glanced at Trevor who was now engaged in a game of soccer with the group of rowdy kids. 

“Inside in five minutes!!” she yelled before going inside. 

Rafael followed her into the kitchen with the baby in tow. 

“So your husband has always wanted a family…. But not you?” Nancy grabbed a bottle from the fridge and handed it to Rafael. She then began to make snack plates for the kids. 

“I didn’t think I deserved to have a family.” he answered. 

“Well, I can already tell you do. You and your husband seem like your have a lot of love to give.” she grinned as the children ran in going straight for the sink. The older children helped the younger ones reach the water to wash their hands. 

“Why don’t you and Trevor take Nathan to the living room to talk?” she suggested taking the baby girl back from Rafael. 

Since they had played together Nathan followed Trevor without opposition. 

They sat on the couch, Rafael feeling more nervous around the chatty four year old then the baby. 

“So Nathan, I know Ms. Nancy told you that we want you to live with us.” Trevor started. 

Nathan looked at Trevor and then at Rafael. 

“You live together? Like Nancy and Steve?” Nathan asked. 

“Yes, we’re married like Nancy and Steve.” Trevor replied. 

“H-He’s Trevor.” Nathan looked at Rafael and pointed to him, “what’s your name?” he asked then looked away. 

“Rafael. Rafi.” Rafael smiled at as child fidgeted, he was struggling to focus. 

“Rafi. Sounds like Papi!!” Nathan yelled excitedly. 

“We will take care of you and your baby brother. Did Nancy tell you about your brother?” Trevor asked gently. 

Nathan nodded his head enthusiastically. “Can I meet him!?” 

“We can bring him next time we visit.” Rafael offered. 

That made Nathan even more excited. Rafael hated to leave when it was time but they didn’t want to impose too much on Nancy. 

“We’ll be back in a week. Unless you think that is too soon? Too long?” Rafael felt Trevor’s hands on his shoulders, indicating he should probably calm down. 

Nancy chuckled lightly at him. “You two are welcome whenever. Maybe you could take Nathan to the park in a couple of days?” 

Rafael grinned. “Yes, that would be great.” 

Rafael couldn’t stop smiling the whole car ride back to their apartment. Back to their son. 

“I love you.” Trevor stated as he put the car in park. 

Rafael took Trevor’s hand off the gear shirt and kissed his knuckles gently. 

“I love you too. Let’s not keep Rogelio waiting.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The end, but actually just the set up for more one-shots of the Barba-Langan family

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy all the fluff. Sorry it is much shorter than the other chapters. 
> 
> I had to quit my job. I have been very depressed. So I needed some fluff in my life. 
> 
> Un-betaed, per usual.

The office was fairly quiet for a Tuesday. It might have been quiet because Rafael had shushed everyone who had come close to his office door. 

He was dressed in his normal business attire but his tie had been loosened, his jacket hung and his shirt sleeves rolled up to his elbow. In his arms he cradled a small baby girl. The baby already had curly hair that framed her face. 

His office door opened and Rafael was ready to glare at whomever dared come inside. Rafael’s face softened when he realized it was Trevor. 

“Wow, I forgot how amazing you look with a baby in your arms.” Trevor whispered. 

The baby girl’s eyes opened. Rafael would have fussed at Trevor but she wasn’t upset. She smiled up at Rafael and giggled when he gave her a gentle bounce in his arms. 

“So how did you get roped into babysitting?” Trevor chuckled, leaning down and kissing his husband sweetly. Trevor’s beard was full, scratching Rafael’s cheek. He loved the feeling. 

“Carmen brought Elena to see her Daddy. I suggested they go to lunch together.” Rafael explained. Rafael’s friendship with Carmen had always been special. She and Sonny had helped him a lot when Rogelio was a baby and when Nathan’s adoption went through he was happy to return the favor. 

“That was kind of you.” Rafael heard some surprise in Trevor’s voice. 

“We do owe Sonny and Carmen for many of our date nights.” Rafael reminded him. 

“Of course, love.” Trevor made his way over to his desk, putting his briefcase down.

Rafael and Trevor were in the office more now that, Nathan was in elementary and Rogelio was in daycare full-time. 

After they met Nathan life had been a whirlwind. The adoption had been fast-tracked and Nathan was in their home within a few weeks. While Rafael had been hesitant to let Trevor help with the baby, he was able to let go more with two children in their home. The pair had given more of the firm’s responsibilities to Sonny and focused on their family. 

Rogelio had many health problems as the doctors had suspected he would. Rafael’s biggest struggle was balance, not only with work but with Trevor. Every struggle was worth it. 

“Can I hold her?” Trevor walked back over to Rafael. Trevor looked extremely handsome in his suit. Fatherhood hadn’t changed him much over the years, expect for his hair. Rafael had recently convinced him to stop dying his hair. Rafael loved how the grey looked on him. 

“Here you go, Trev.” Rafael handed the grinning girl over to Trevor. 

“It’s strange now that Rogelio is a toddler.” Rafael mused, “I miss having a baby at home.” 

Trevor looked at him with a toothy grin. 

“Oh no, don’t give me that look. We are too old for another baby. I was just being nostalgic.” 

Trevor laughed, “Well, enjoy Elena while she is a baby because Carmen says that’s their one and only.” 

Rafael remembered when he met Carmen, a baby had been the furthest thing from her mind. Then she met Sonny. Sonny had wanted a big Italian family. They compromised and they were happy. Rafael respected them for that. 

“We’re back!” Sonny announced as he and Carmen entered their office. 

Carmen went over to Trevor and he handed the now squealing Elena over to her. 

“Thank you for watching her.” Carmen smiled, “I see this man, all the time, but I hardly get to spend any quality time with him.” 

Trevor walked over to Rafael and placed his hands on the shorter man’s waist. There was a time Rafael would have hated the display of affection. Now, he felt the corner of his lips rise as he leaned into his husband’s embrace. 

“We don’t mind.” Rafael stated. 

“If you play your cards right, Rafael can be your on-call babysitter.” 

Rafael jabbed his husband in the side hard enough to cause the man to cry out. 

“Be gentle with your old man.” Sonny snickered. 

Rafael glared at his co-worker and apparently his glare still had power because Sonny Carisi wilted just a bit. 

“I’m going to take this little lady home.” Carmen gave her husband a kiss on the cheek and tried to walk away but the squirming of Elena, who started to cry, slowed her down.

“Ugh,” Carmen groaned, “she is such a Daddy’s girl.” 

Elena reached for Sonny, her tears starting to to fall and her sobs growing louder until he took her into his arms. 

Rafael studied Sonny. His expression, adoring, as he looked at his daughter. Rafael knew the expression well. Trevor looked at their children that way. 

“I love you baby girl.” he heard Sonny whisper to the crying girl, his words seemed to calm her. 

Rafael hadn’t realized he was staring until he felt Trevor’s lips on the side of his head, he turned into the kiss and returned it with a soft kiss to Trevor’s cheek. 

“I love you.” Rafael whispered as Carmen and Elena said their goodbyes to Sonny. “I love our life, the firm, our friends, our children…” 

Rafael felt completely content.


End file.
